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By CHRIS MALBURG

Most people would agree that networking is vital to succeeding in business. But few know the secrets of doing it well.

There is an etiquette to networking. Disregarding these rules can have a detrimental impact on one’s career. When networking is done right, however, we often forget it’s even happening.

Here are five sure-fire rules of etiquette to improve your networking.

Rule #1: Forget about yourself concentrate on what you can do for the person you’re meeting. Successful networkers actively search for ways to put their extensive contacts together for the mutual betterment of both parties.

Sally Wright, founder of MarkeTeam, recommends employing these points for successful networking: First, focus your primary objective on furthering relationships. Next, really listen to the needs of others and become a valuable resource. Only promise what you can realistically deliver. Finally, act to earn the trust of others.

Davis Blaine, co-founder of the Professionals Networking Group, adds, “The best networkers share freely and never keep score. Identifying what you can do for someone else then following through will perhaps one day return the favor to you.”

Rule #2: Patience. It takes time to clearly identify a potential referral’s strengths and weaknesses. Yet, consider the desperate person who stamps in red, “I love referrals” on mass-mailing envelopes. A less tacky thought is, “I love to give referrals but first, let’s get to know one another.” Be certain when you finally do refer someone that it’s a perfect match for both parties. This is a case where a focused laser beats a scattergun every time.

Rule #3: The seven do’s and don’ts of networking:

? Do volunteer to split the meal bill.

? Don’t (ever, ever, ever) stand up a meeting date.

? “Do introduce yourself at networking opportunities,” offers Judy Jernud, founder of Prime Performance, a communications coaching firm. “Remember, others may be uncomfortable meeting strangers too.” Being first to break the ice does others the tremendous favor of placing them at ease.

? Don’t name drop. At best, illustrious names do not impress. Usually, they raise the question of what the person is hiding that requires such artificial self-promotion.

? “Do make eye contact, speak slowly and clearly,” encourages Jernud. “Offer sincere compliments when appropriate. People like hearing something positive, especially about themselves.”

? “Don’t talk too much,” cautions Wright of MarkeTeam. “Shift focus of the conversation after briefly introducing yourself. Ask, ‘What is the profile of your typical client?’ Two other good questions are, ‘When you first get a client, what do they want from you?’ and ‘What has been your biggest business challenge?’ Then pay close attention to the answer.”

? Do think about those attending an upcoming networking opportunity. Plan to talk with those who might benefit from an introduction to someone you know who is also attending.

Rule #4: Briefly describe what you do. People begin judging us the instant we start speaking. Do not introduce yourself by exhaustively explaining the technical minutiae of your company and all that it does. “This sounds like a pitch even if you didn’t intend it that way,” concludes Jernud.

Keep descriptions of your work short. Practice summarizing what you do in the space of a sound bite about 25 seconds. This so-called “elevator speech” should name the firm you work for. Be sure to include your formal title along with the job you do (stated in no more than 10 seconds). Finally, identify who your clients or customers are and who they should be.

If your audience wants more, they’ll ask. Some networking savants further abbreviate what they do into just a few well-chosen words. A divorce attorney may say, “I make people happy.” As a consultant to companies undergoing explosive growth, I sometimes say, “I help companies survive their own success.” Again, the point is to hook your audience’s interest so they want to hear more.

Rule #5: Never waste people’s time. To avoid that, carefully select those you invite into your network. Be sure to include a broad mix of people in your circle. Then stratify your network into three levels:

Level I should be your superior contacts. These people don’t compete against you and they serve the same market and market segment as you. There exists a genuine chemistry between you. Always keep these people on your radar screen and vice versa.

Level II should be your strong potential contacts. These serve the same market, but not necessarily the same market segment. Consider these the people you want to invest the time to know. As your relationship develops, they may turn into a superior contact.

Level III should be people who can refer you to other referral sources. These contacts may not even serve your same general market, however, if the chemistry exists, they may provide an entr & #233;e to those who do. Keeping these folks in your networking circle widens the possibility of making a beneficial contact. You never know who they might be sitting next to on an airplane, or at a dinner party perhaps your next big client.

Networking effectively takes practice. Adopt these five points of etiquette, and soon you will find it an easy habit. It is not intrusive or artificial. People view the best networkers as helpful individuals who are well connected and know how to get just what they want from their careers and their lives.

Chris Malburg heads Chris Malburg, CPAs, an accounting firm serving rapidly growing companies in a variety of industries. He can be reached by e-mail at [email protected].

Entrepreneur’s Notebook is a regular column contributed by EC2, The Annenberg Incubator Project, a center for multimedia and electronic communications at the University of Southern California. Contact James Klein at (213) 743-1759 with feedback and topic suggestions.