A recent Bureau of Labor Statistics study reported that one out of every four dual-career couples has the wife making more than the husband.

More women are starting companies, paying themselves well, and going public. More women have had stock options in technology and investment firms that made them rich.

More women are marrying older men who are retired, and more women are choosing not to have children, which allows them to focus on their careers and compete with men for the big bucks. More women are marrying artists, writers, teachers or men in lower-paying professions.

Tanja and John Cebula started out as a dual-career couple. They are both CPAs with master’s degrees. They were both working full time when they met, married and became parents of a daughter and twin sons.

Tanja was managing the Portland office of Resources Connection Inc., an offshoot of Deloitte & Touche, and John was the controller of the University of Portland. Tanja was offered more money and great career potential in Orange County. So they decided to move. John volunteered to stay home with the children. He could have gotten a job in Orange County but they decided they wanted one parent at home.

John did all the housework and child rearing until recently, when they hired some help. He also handles the family investments and is starting up a part-time business. He coaches kids and attends PTA meetings, where he is the only guy.

Tanja has a bright career future and loves what she does. In no way does she feel the relationship with her children has been jeopardized. She considers her family responsibilities as important as her career and spends “quality time” with her husband and children.

Even today, the Cebulas are unusual. Most men still define themselves in terms of their job, title and how much money they make. In addition, being the breadwinner provides a measure of power and control. Thus in marriages where power and control are an issue, and when a wife makes more than her husband, a marriage is probably headed for trouble.

Clearly, early sex-role expectations spill over into the workplace. Successful men are expected to be breadwinners. Successful women, mothers and homemakers. Fortunately for both men and women, the definition of success is changing. No longer are stay-at-home dads always seen as unmanly, nor breadwinner women seen as tough and uncaring mothers.

Clearly, as Yogi Berra said, “The future ain’t what it used to be.” While the wife as breadwinner, and husband as “daily dad” may not be for everyone, it’s a lifestyle choice whose time has come.

*Judith Rosener is a professor at UC Irvine’s Paul Merage School of Business.