It’s a Matter of Street Smarts

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I sure appreciate the city of Los Angeles for protecting naïve and commercially vulnerable people like you and me. I mean, if it weren’t for the city, we could just walk around and buy T-shirts or hot dogs, all manner of stuff, from sidewalk vendors.

But the city bans sidewalk selling, and I for one am real happy about that.

Just think: If sidewalk vending were allowed, you could buy kitchenware for $10 instead of $25. Or a toy for $5 instead of $9. Or a combo meal for $4 instead of $9, as one man said in the article that begins on page 1 of this issue. But we have the city government, thank goodness, to protect us from low prices.

Even though street selling is illegal, it’s fairly common. But if it were to be made legal, there likely would be even more little sidewalk shops pop up. Imagine the horrors. Why, you could pick up something while you were walking from a restaurant to your parking lot or from the train station home. That would be called convenience, and we sure don’t want that in Los Angeles.

Critics of sidewalk vending point out that some stuff sold on the street isn’t always of the highest quality and consumers need to be shielded from that. And they’re absolutely right. I mean, you’ve never had to be a choosy buyer in your whole life, right? Imagine the strain on your brain of having to decide whether you wanted to buy this brand over that brand, or patronize this guy instead of that woman. Thank heavens the city is protecting us from the burden of making our own buying decisions.

Oh, and just think of the entrepreneurship that could pop up. If sidewalk vending were legalized, why, people who needed income could just spread out a blanket on a sidewalk and start making money. Some of the really good ones could become successful, expand and go on to open a shop or a restaurant or a warehouse and send their kids to college. Maybe some could even be millionaires someday. C’mon, now. We can’t have that here. The city would much rather keep those people standing at intersections holding cardboard signs. And those sign holders’ kids could learn from them and carry on the trade.

Some established businesses complain that street vendors undercut their prices and take away customers. They sure have a point, although I’ve also seen brick-and-mortar restaurants set up sidewalk stands, too, to capture some of the grab-and-go trade. That’s an example of the kind of innovation we don’t want and besides, this is America. We can’t have businesses trying to outdo each other. Competition might force even more businesses to cut prices and improve service. The city sure needs to keep that from happening.

Street vending has been banned here for a long time, so many folks are skeptical of the nascent effort to make it legal. A movement called the Los Angeles Street Vendor Campaign, for example, wants to legalize food vending and set up a system “that gives micro-entrepreneurs an opportunity to make an honest living” and establishes Los Angeles “as the capital of street food and culture.”

They want to create a permit system and have street vendors abide by certain rules, such as to stay clear from businesses’ doorways and not to set up on landscaping.

And you know, what? The city might just make sidewalk sales legal.

I know that seems hard to believe, but I imagine the city has a secret plan: They’ll go ahead and legalize street vending, but make each vendor go through the city’s usual permitting process. That means multiple permits from different offices. Each one takes months to get. By the time you get the final permit, the first one has expired, etc.

Then illegal businesses will know the special hell that legal businesses go through in this city. They’ll give up and go away.

And you and I, naïve and commercially vulnerable stooges that we are, will be protected from them.

Charles Crumpley is editor of the Business Journal. He can be reached at [email protected].

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